Tuesday, November 8, 2011

A big family....how big is too big?

I'm sure many of you have heard that the Duggar family is expecting baby #20.  I heard on the radio this morning.  I've only seen a couple epidsodes of their show, so I'm no "Duggar expert."  It really makes you question how many children is too many.  If they are able to take care of them, should they be able to keep having them?  Thankfully, we live in a free country where they are able to have as many children as they want.  I can't say whether it's "right" or not.  It's not my family and I don't feel I have the right to judge them (well...I try not to).

There are so many children born that do not have a good family to raise them.  Some men have more children than they even know about or can count.  I assume all women know how many children they've had. ;)  I guess at least with the Duggars they are taking care of them and they are self sufficient.  I'm sure money from the TV special helps.  I come from a large family and helped take care of younger siblings (my baby brother is in High School).  It's hard being a big sister taking care of younger siblings, but it wasn't devastating to my childhood and I learned a lot about children.  I still became a teacher, so it didn't make me hate taking care of children at all.

Personally, I already feel inadequate as a mother at times.  I have to work and I can't always be with my children all the time.  Though I feel some separation is good, I wish I had more time to spend with my children.  I have to divide my attention between two (who am I kidding...3 counting the hubby) when I am home and with them.  I can't even imagine multiplying that by 10!  I do want to have another child though.  With finances and many other things we've considered, 3 children is probably our limit.  Knowing that if we are blessed with another child it will be our last is helping me be patient.  I'm not ready to have my last baby. 

No matter how exhaused, tired, and overwhelmed I am, I love my family and don't regret one minute!

Do you think the size of a family should be limited?

I think before we limit the size of a family we should look at those wanting more children that can't take care of the family they already have whether it's 1 child or 10.  I'm not just talking financially.  Lots of people have financial hardships arise and are able to overcome that.  My Mom managed to be a young, low income parent and she managed.  I'm talking about financial combined with emotional, physical, and overall well being of the child.

1 comment:

auntietina said...

I am the 7th out of 8 kids, and I remember when I was getting ready to graduate high school I was meeting with my advisor about college applications. I got to read my entire 'official record' and one comment around 3rd grade blew my mind: something to the effect that it seemed I was being raised mostly by older siblings. Which was true, to some extent.

I shake my head at the thought of a family that large, but if it works for them, more power to them. And so far they seem to have avoided the 'reality show' curse.

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...